Disneyland, Episode 4: Beaches

The last day of our Disneyland trip, we stopped by the beach for an hour on the way back to the airport. Sabrina did not like the sand. She did not like the waves.
She did not like the shells, at least after I told her she could not eat them. All in all, a big hit!
Fortunately, Spencer loved the ocean, even though it was relatively cold. But next time we bring boogie boards in August!

Because Redondo Beach, L.A-A (are you singing the song, children of the 60s?) doesn't have great parking for the millions of people who want to play there, Zane dropped me off with the two kids and went to park the car. Because I'm smart like that, I left my phone in the car. Zane did not show up. And did not show up. So, of course I'm panicking, because it's not like we have a lot of time, and where is he, and what happens if he does not show up (this is the part of my brain that saw Sabrina drowning in the log ride at Magic Mountain). So, I decide, I must call him on a borrowed phone. Item: the family close to me includes a scarily-tattooed 20-something man. Well, you KNOW not to judge a book by its cover, and as a middle school teacher it takes more than tattoos to scare me, so I walked up to him and his girlfriend and asked in that "I know I'm a stranger but aren't we all members of the human family" way if I could use their cell phone. Before I can even finish the question, the scarily-tattooed man jumped up and handed me his phone. Aw. We ARE all members of the same human family.

Disneyland, Episode 3: Sleepless in Strolladle

Sleeping was awesome on the vacation. When I say "awesome," I mean, "Sabrina, please, let me sleeeeeeep." Sabrina and I slept in one bed, so when she woke up in the night I could just feed her. That part was fine. Naps, however, looked like this:
And they lasted, oh, maybe 40 minutes MAX. Not good. Also, she has been waking up SCREAMING the past few nights, and will not go back to sleep. Not fun, and must stop. On the other hand, she sometimes managed to pull this off, despite no nap: Don't lie. This is the cutest picture you have ever seen. It's a picture of Sabrina seeing herself in the backwards viewfinder of the camera. So this smile? It's because she is sooooo excited to see the baby in the camera! It's so weird...this same baby is in the mirror at home!

Here are a few more photos that are so cute I can't stand it, but have no relation to the topic of the post. Deal. Here's us waiting for Daddy and Spencer to come off the Revolution, the first roller coaster to have a loop (get it? Revolution?), and built in 1976 (get it? Revolution?). While we were waiting, a girl came up to us and said her friend's baby had just gone "number 2" and her friend forgot wipes. I handed some over. Yeah, I'm a hero. Anyway, the baby:


And it THIS one, we are in a kid-sized jeep that drives around a track at Magic Mountain. Sabrina was tired (see: no naps), but after a couple of consecutive rides, due in no small part to the fact that the park was practically empty, she began to have fun and drive the jeep. Look at her face--you can tell she's totally into it. How will she ever go back to play-sized cars again?


Coming soon: Disneyland, Episode 4: Beaches (I heart 80s movies)

Disneyland, Episode 2: Waterworld and Babyland

It may come as a surprise to you that most rides at amusement parks are not designed for 8 1/2-moth-olds. I know, it was a shock to me too. However, there are some rides and amenities designed specifically for the babicapped. My favorite was the baby pass. For those of you who have not been to Disneyland since I was 14 (that's 10 years ago) (oops, I mean 17 year ago. My GOSH), there is now an invention called the FastPass. The idea is, every 2 hours or so you go to a little kiosk, scan your entrance pass, and get a ticket. You are assigned a specific time to come back (say, between 5 and 6 pm), and go in a line that is 10 minutes long, instead of standing for an hour. Anyway, if you have a baby, one person can wait in the hour-long line while the other person goes on the Haunted Mansion or people-watches, and then when the rider is done, the baby-watcher gets to go in the Fastpass lane. Awesome!

Another option, of course, is to take the Babe on certain rides with you. One ride Sabrina loved was the Yellow Submarine ride, now named something about Finding Nemo's Disneyland Tie-In And Would You Like To Buy A Souvenier, or something like that. Here's a picture:

Sabrina loved the ride. She sat on my lap and stared out the little porthole. Until the klaxon sounded and the red light flashed. THEN she wanted DADDY. "Aaaahhh! Something scary is happening! I need protection! I need Daddy!" So much for having a feminist for a daughter!

At Magic Moutain, I took Sabrina on a log ride. I must have asked Zane a hundred times if he thought she would be okay on the ride, mostly because I am an evil, passive-aggressive female-type who didn't really want to take Sabrina on the ride because I thought it would be too much for her, but didn't want to say so. And also because my head was inconveniently showing me pictures of Sabrina falling out of the fake log and into the water and drowning. So, long story short, Sabrina went on the ride. And actually liked it. And did not get too wet. Until...

You know how you can put a quarter in squirt guns and squirt the people who are on the ride? Well, you can. And some STUPID teenage BOYS thought it would be funny to squirt someone. My bad luck that it happened to be ME. And TINY. She got soaked. She wasn't mad, but I sure was! In fact, I MAY have yelled at those dumb boys. But I forget what I said.

So, Sabrina is wet, and had sunscreen in her hair to protect her little scalp. Here's her hair afterwards.

I tried to spike it, but I was just fooling myself. She didn't have spiked hair, she was a lion-in-training. See? It's a little mane, and doesn't go around her chin, but let's not kid ourselves that it's just spikey on top of her head. Lionbaby.

Coming soon: Episode 3: Sleepless (and otherwise) in Strollers

Disneyland, Episode 1: What not to wear

As I strolled through the human zoos that are Disneyland and Magic Mountain, I was struck by some observations on what not to wear. I wish I could have gotten pictures, but I am a long way from my stalker days, and even if I were more current on my stalker skills, I don't have a long-range zoom on my camera, and it was too hot to wear black. You will have to do with the written word.

And thus, without further ado: What Not To Wear At Amusement Parks!

1. A (very) low-necked, royal blue, floor (dirty ground)-length gown.
2. A (very) low-necked spaghetti-strap tank top with no sunscreen.
3. High-heeled sandals with aforementioned tank top (I mean really, you are walking MILES all over the park!)
4. Tank top, miniskirt, and Ugs.
5. Ugs over your jeans.
6. In fact, there was a plague of Ugs. People! This is Southern California in April! It's like, 90 degrees! What are you WORRIED about?
7. Leggings (blue), with a crotch-skimming shirt. Look into pants, as the folks at the Fug Blog would say. Besides, it's not like she was a young, slender thing, if you get my drift.
8. Tattoo sleeves. Ugh. Just, Ugh.
9. Shorts that are too short and too small. And one leg rides up.

On the other hand, you should ABSOLUTELY wear:

1. Sunscreen
2. A baby
3. Hats, all types
4. Cargo pants! If you're a guy! I tell you, Zane had so many pockets THAT ZIPPED UP that he could carry anything on a ride! Cell phone! Wallet! 3-course Thanksgiving Dinner! Anything!
5. A Buzz Lightyear costume

Coming soon: Episode 2: Waterworld

Disneyland Preview

Sabrina has learned how to make more noises lately. I know, it's just what every mother wants, but this is a QUIET noise. She can move her tongue horizontally and make a quiet popping-type noise. She loves this noise. Loves it. She actually cracks me up, she's so intense about making the sound.

And, it's come! Spring Break! That means 7 week or 33 days of school left. Also, it means...Disneyland! We are leaving tomorrow for that Paradise of Childhood. I'm SO excited for the plane ride with a Tiny One, but I'm sure she'll be fine. I will therefore be incommunicado for the next week, but I will certainly update you when I get back. Ah, sun, sea, sand, Mickey...see you in a week!

More Soccer

Spencer's first comp soccer game was yesterday. It was cold, rainy, and occasionally hailey. Er, it hailed. Through it all, Sabrina sat on my lap, enthralled, and watched the soccer game. I dressed her in a little yellow coat with a tassel on the hood, sat her on my lap, and covered us both with a blanket. Just her little face peeked out. By the end of the game she wanted to start crawling around and play with the grass (an improvement in her sensory likes and dislikes!), but for most of the game she was happy just to watch. Oh, and Spencer's team won 3-1. The poor goalie on the other team started crying after the third goal, "It's my fault we're losing." Poor, poor little boy. My pity, however, is tempered by the fact that we won. Yay! Better the other team crying than my team crying, I always say.

So, that was very successful. And (because I know you're all interested), Sabrina woke up twice last night, and had to cry herself to sleep again after the first time she woke up. WHAT is the DEAL? GO to SLEEP, Tiny baby!

Karma will get you every time

I may have been guilty of a bit of hubris, talking about how Sabrina is getting so big. Well, I found the newborn in her last night--FOUR times. Yeah, I'm beginning to remember why Sabrina was not always the cutest baby, back when four times was a regular night. Curse you, Karma! I guess I'll have to keep it a secret when Sabrina is wonderful, lest the evil eye get me. The optimist in me, however, believes tonight will be better. After all, it can't be much worse!

Sego Lily Blogger

Once there was a mommy who wanted to run away. She said "I am running away." Vacuum Cleaner said, "If you run away, then I will pop a wheelie on my back wheels and roll after you." The mommy said, "I guess I will come back and vacuum my house. And THEN I am running away!"

Then Oven said, "If you run away, I will grow legs and come running after you!" So the mommy said, "If you grow legs and come after me, I will come back, and even though I love Microwave more, I will cook on you. THEN I will run away!"

And Laptop said, "If you run away, I will jump off the desk and crawl after you!" And the mommy sat down and cried, because she knew that even if she did work on Laptop, next Dustcloth or Lawnmower would probably come after her, and she knew she could never run away.

In the middle of the mommy's tears, Superhusband came home. He said, "Tonight, I will feed the kids a nutritious, homemade dinner, and here is a gift certificate to Sego Lily Day Spa.

So the mommy went to Sego Lily Day Spa. First, since she had been on her feet for so long vacuuming her house, she got a Sego Lily Indulgence Pedicure and French Paint on her tonails. Because her skin was so dry from the hot air of Oven, she got a Signature Facial of vitamins, anti-oxidants, plant-driven proteins and firming botanicals. Finally, since she had hunched over Laptop for hours that day, she got an Aromatherapy Massage, which restored harmony to her mind, body and spirit and relaxed her shoulder muscles.

When the mommy got home her children were all sleeping sweetly in their beds, and she realized that she did not want to run away, she just wanted to get away. So the mommy decided that she needed to go to Sego Lily Day Spa regularly to quench her body’s thirst for serenity in this chaotic world.

And that is why I should be the Sego Lily Day Spa blogger.

New Nicknames

Zane has taken to calling Sabrina "T-bone." Is this:
a) a reference to the "T-rex," that monster of a baby girl;
b) a rapper;
c) a steak; or
d) none of the above?

The answer, of course, is D, none of the above. T stands for (what else) TINY, as in "Tiny bones." In context, "You have such tiny bones! Yes you do! You are tiny!" Sadly, Sabrina's nickname of "Tiny" is winding down, due to her increasing largeness, but T-bone is kind of growing on me. And she can always become a rapper later.