Candy's Wedding

So, Candy got married to Ben on Saturday with the reception the night before. A good way to do it, I think. Then you're not so tired for the wedding night!

The reception was really nice. But that girl does not mess around with her wedding colors! (Wedding colors always make me think of Steel Magnolias: "My colahs ah blush and bashful." "Yoah colahs ah pink and pink.") Her colors were pink, teal, and purple. There was a candy table with candy of those colors, streamers and ribbons in those colors, and a purple chocolate fountain. Ben is a good sport.

The wedding was at the Bountiful temple. With Salt Lake closed for 7 (seven!) weeks and Ogden being remodeled, there were approximately 64,000 weddings at Bountiful. Still, it was very nice. I found out Ben's full name is Benjamin Joseph Alexander Neals (sp?) Nicholls. Whoa. Also, MY brother's name is Benjamin Joseph, and my son's name technically is Alexander. Double whoa.

Ben was very sweet at the ceremony, and sadly most of us are sympathetic criers. Good thing I had waterproof mascara. However, I was a little bugged by the sealer. He gave a talk at the beginning, and that's just what it was. It was totally a memorized, rote speech. Not really what you want at a wedding. Well, not really what I want. Fortunately, Uncle Don sealed me and Zane, so I got personal, loving advice. "Candace and Benjamin" didn't, so much. Also, there was so much talk about children! What if they have trouble getting pregnant? Or want to wait a few years? And (not to complain too much), the sealer was very traditionalist, talking about the joy that Ben will have bringing forth his lovely wife in the resurrection, just like he (the sealer) will do for his wife and sons. But not his daughters. THEY will be resurrected by their husbands. It all felt very "women are property-ish" to me.

The wedding dinner, however, was nothing less than stellar. The tables were all set up as African animals, as Ben is from Zimbabwe. Or "Zimb." So, there was the baboon table, giraffe table, zebra table, and so on. We all got a little zebra or giraffe key chain, handmade from wire and beads. The food was great, the company was great, and the speeches made everyone cry. What more could we ask for? Just that Karen did not have to leave right after it.

Congratulations Candy and Ben! Welcome to the family, BJANN.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl

Four years ago today, Sabrina came into the world. For the previous nine months, I had controlled what went into her, what she heard, what she felt. I've heard children have a hard time differentiating themselves from their parents until they're about 2, but it was the other way with me. I could not tell a difference between us. When she had a milk sensitivity, I was confused. We love milk!

Now, I know we're different people. (For one thing, I was never that snotty at 4, I'm sure.) But that doesn't mean I truly feel separate from her. Someone tells her they won't play with her? My heart breaks in two. She cries because Daddy is making her eat her noodles? I want to hold her and tell her she only has to eat one half of a noodle. She is afraid of the water? Just let me hold you. Don't be scared. I know I can't give into these impulses, but I feel her pain like mine.

Of course, there's the other side, too. She goes down the water slide? My heart bursts with pride. Her squealing delight at successfully completing Fruit Ninja on the Xbox Kinect makes me laugh out loud. "Mom, I DID it!" when she sounds out mmmmm and sssss is so unbelievably joyful.

I don't want to be the mom that makes her children think it's their job to make her happy. It's not. It's my job to be happy. But dang, girl. You make it easy.

Happy birthday baby girl. I'm so glad you're my daughter.

Family Reunion

A few weeks ago, we went to a Sargent family reunion in Washington. (We were near Forks, but we didn't see any vampires. Probably because it was miracle weather with sunny skies every day. Not common, I understand.) It was great in almost every way.

It was great because the setting was amazing, the beach was fun, and the food was great. It was fun to have Mom and Dad there to take the older kids, especially. With a newborn, it was nice to have some other grownups delighted to take my kids. Who am I kidding? It's ALWAYS nice to have grandma and grandpa around to spoil my kids! I also loved the airshow Uncle Wayne did, seeing Amanda in her helicopter, and watching the little kids.

It was also really great to see all my family that I haven't seen in years. Here's the problem: I wanted to hear more about Uncle Jerry's new business, Aunt Gay and Uncle Peter's new stores, my cousin's new jobs and kids and houses, and sit and visit with all the aunties (and Uncle Dale, honorary auntie). Sadly, I had kids with unreasonable demands, like wanting dinner. It meant I just didn't get to have the same reunion as my childhood: playing on Grandpa's hay, making tiny dollhouses, doing talent shows, making capes (i.e. having a cape made for me), and so on. Those were the days, my friend.

Random Catch up

I know it's been awhile since I've posted last. There are two reasons for this. 1) I have a new baby, which probably should actually make me post more, and 2) I've been depressed sad. I guess "depressed" is a loaded term in our family! I don't think I diagnosable, just feeling like I have a mountain to climb. It turns out our car was totaled, because it's all aluminum. Why does that matter? I'm so glad you asked! Turns out, you have to have a whole different, specially-designated set of tools for all-aluminum cars. So, instead of $45/hour for repairing the little car, it was $125/hr. Well, that took the car from being repairable to being, well, not.

So, Zane went car shopping. I tried to abdicate responsibility completely, but he forced me to voice my opinion, which was mostly "that sounds fine," or "that's maybe more than we wanted to spend." He ended up with a Mini (precious!) with only about 90,000 miles, which is considerably less than our poor totaled Insight. However, the day (THE DAY) we got it, the power steering went out. $1,000. See why I've been depressed sad?

Add that money issue to this one: Zane has too many clients who think they have a right to free legal care. Newsflash: that only applies to criminal cases, and then guess what? The attorney STILL GETS PAID. By taxpayers. The attorney DOES NOT WORK FOR FREE!!!!! Stupid non-payers of their legal bills. It's stressful to own your own business.

In happier news, Raiden is still being called Jemonis by his big brother and sister. He's sleeping better, or maybe I just can't find the baby monitor. Whichever. He only woke up once the last two nights, which does not suck, and might be why I feel like I have the energy to blog this morning!

Sabrina and Sasha are gradually getting used to having a baby. They've always been perfect with Raiden, but Sasha has bled a couple of times from Sabrina's fingernails, and Sabrina's done her share of crying about being hit. I think they're getting better.

The final happy news (for now) is that my sister-in-law Karen is here! She lives in Iowa, where Austin goes to medical school, which is too far away for regular visits. My kids are loving playing with her five kids, and I'm loving talking with her and watching her do fancy gymnastics tricks. By the way, have you ever been up close and personal when a real gymnast is doing tricks? Whoa. They are real athletes, which you don't realize as much when you see them wearing sparkles and hugging each other after a routine. Between the sparkles and the hugs? Some serious strength and athleticism going on there.

So, that's most of the last month. Upcoming: The vacation to Washington!

Friday (every day) night fights

Sabrina and Sasha are both SO CUTE with Raiden. Some comments from Sabrina: "He is so precious," "Oh, little guy," "He so cute." Also, when I went to put Raiden to bed last night, I found his bassinet already taken -- by a baby doll, covered by a burp cloth. She also drove her doll in a stroller to the "car," where a car seat was waiting for the doll to be transferred.

Sasha's language is less developed, of course, but he will pet Raiden's little head and say "Monis." For Jemonis, of course, which both kids insist on continuing to call him.

Right now, Sabrina and Sasha are giggling and playing together. I give it three minutes before one of them is crying. Either that, or they'll wait until I am feeding Raiden, at which time they will start hitting each other. They have this instinctive sense of when they can render me the most impotent, **crying** and take advantage. I confess I've done a version of "wait until your father gets home," but that also renders me powerless.

I know their fighting is just a way of getting my attention in this new world of precious little guys. I'm trying to give them positive attention, I really am. Mom is also **crying!** coming up a lot to give special attention to the two depraved deprived ones. **more crying -- ooh, and hitting!** It really does work, although Grandma is now their favorite person on the planet. **lotsa crying** I wish she were here now.

Lagoon, take 2

Last year, I took Sabrina to Lagoon. She positively sobbed in terror going on the boats. Y'know the boats? Where six boats get pulled in a very slow circle in very shallow water? Thanks to her cousin Kellen, she managed to not jump out of the boats. That and a seat belt that needed a key to unlock.

This year, in hopes of not repeating this particular scene, I told Sabrina how fun it would be, but also how she needed to help Sasha not be scared. I think it was natural for her to not be scared of the boats this time, just because they're not scary, but it was more than that. Zane took them to some insane spaceship ride that was really fast and spinny, and frankly, I kind of worried about how they'd do. Sabrina held really tight to Sasha so he wouldn't be scared (or because she was scared, not sure which), but then wanted to go on it again! She also went on the planes, and also Puff, the kiddie roller coaster, with Zane. Puff was the least successful, but after the first go-round, in which she tried to become one with Zane, she even seemed to be having fun. Sasha was less scared, but he was also sort of comatose-looking due to it being way past his bedtime.

Now, although Lagoon is no Disneyland, there are compensations. For instance, we didn't have to wait 1 1/2 hours for any ride. Kiddie land has some really good rides for the Sasha and Sabrina crowd, and Lagoon-A-Beach is a fun water park. Here's where Lagoon is not as good as Disneyland: the happiest place on earth can pay a pittance for smiling peon to make sure your kid is buckled into the whales. Lagoon cannot. They get slow, apathetic teenagers who don't CARE that you've been waiting for 10 minutes just for the d*mn boats to get loaded! I mean, really, get a move on! The ride is only 6 boats, 12 kids MAX, and you're taking 10 minutes to load the boats, 5 to get them unloaded, and 3 for the actual ride. Move it!

Other than that, it was a very successful outing.

Perfection?

Well, it's official. Barring a miracle (or not getting on BC fast enough), our family is complete. I feel really lucky. All of my children have the following areas of perfection: 1. No colic (is it too soon to be sure of this, with only a 1 1/2 week old? Maybe. But he hardly cries at all.) 2. No sensory issues 3. No sticky-outy ears 4. Circumcisions are okay -- I was pretty sure this would be the case, but there are too many TV shows about boys that had to be raised as girls for me to be blase about it 5. No NICU 6. No developmental delays so far (again, Raiden is pretty young for me to be satisfied that there won't be ANY developmental delays, but he's a very advanced 10-day-old) 7. No torticollis (flat head) 8. Good sleeping habits (for a 10-day-old, that's still getting up 3 times at night, but 3 times ain't too bad!) 9. Very rare bathtub pooping 10. Very little spitup 11. Good nursers I do have one complaint, though. Sasha was never a peer, meaning he never peed on me when I changed his diaper. Raiden, though, has peed on me three times so far. The first time, I was so surprised I didn't react quickly, which meant a complete change of clothing for both Raiden and me, as well as a new blanket and cleaning the carpet. I've been ready for him the other times, so it's just been my hand that got it. Still, I was hoping to avoid this little problem. I now get to worry about the following things (NOT AN EXHAUSTIVE LIST) 1. People being mean to them 2. Them being mean to people 3. Bipolar Disorder 4. Never learning how to read 5. The Teenage Years 6. Three teens at once 7. Three college tuition bills at once 8. Curfew 9. Bad teachers 10. Sending them on missions 11. Anaphylaxic shock from bee stings And the list goes on, La de da de de, la de da de da