Saturday, September 21, 2013

Random Crap Update

I know it's been a while since I updated my blog. This has a simple reason: my brain is full. I've heard talk of "chemo brain" where you can't remember stuff. Frankly, it sounds like early-onset dementia. I don't have that. I have a full-time job, three little kids, a broken oven, and oh yeah, cancer. I'm beginning to understand why kids with drama at home -- divorcing parents, dying parents, a sick sibling, financial troubles -- don't give a flying monkey butt about if their reading log is done.

Let's see. I love my job. I love my commute. I even love seeing students at Valley Market and Spencer's AYSO soccer games. It does mean I'm more conscious of wearing hair everywhere instead of just a headcover, but that's a minor issue. I'm used to my wig now.

Speaking of wigs, my hair is really coming back. It's growing slowly since I'm still taking Taxol, but I'm still hoping to have enough hair to be wig-free by after Christmas break. I'll be close, but I can have a sassy spiky haircut, I bet.

I had my 9th Taxol today. Three left! My last treatment will be October 12, one day before I turn 36. Happy birthday to me! Although I don't love having to go to chemo ever Saturday, let's think about what I do. I drive an hour each way (with no kids). For four hours I sit and read, watch TV, visit with friends, family, and Lisa Gauchay Social Worker Extraordinaire, and/or eat treats. How is this a bad thing, again? Oh yeah, because I have cancer. Sometimes it's hard to remember why on earth chemo is a bad thing! Still, I'll have 13 more Herceptin treatments, one every three weeks, when I'm done with Taxol. I think that will be a good weaning from what feels like full-time treatment.

My biggest problem right now, besides Fullbrain, is that my energy is about 80%. That's so much better than when I was taking Adriamycin and Cytoxan so I feel good in comparison to then. Also, I don't have any nausea or anything. But now that I'm well into the school year, I'm feeling the lack of energy. I had someone tell me they were praying for my energy levels, and I really feel their prayer has been answered. Still, I'm not 100%. The other side effect I'm having is that my three middle toes on each foot are numb on the bottom and tips. Weird, but totally not a big deal. I have a tiny bit of neuropathy (numbness and tingling) in my left hand, but it's super minor. And I haven't had a reaction to the Taxol since treatment #2.

My insurance changed, and I did not get my card until I was very out of Lexapro. I know I could have called them and gotten my group number and member ID, but it seemed like it would take a half hour or more. So I just waited. And cried, and cried, and cried. Obviously I should have spent that half hour on the phone! I'm back on Lexapro now, and hopefully will have an easier time liking my family and being nice to them, as well as having less crying!

Sabrina is loving kindergarten. Yesterday she had two kids call to ask to play with her. So, from 4-5 she played with Lucas at the park, from 5-6 she had a horseback riding lesson with one of my students, and from 6-8 she played with Johanna. Phew! That girl loved every second and came home totally wound up. I think she's an extrovert.

I'll try to be better about updating my blog. I mean to, but my full brain makes me want to sit on the couch and play Diablo III. Besides, I'm getting really good.

Sasha: 3

Happy birthday little boy! I love you so much, and am so glad you are my sonshine!

Sasha, just three years ago, was a big, big bump in my belly. He was always awake from 10 to 11 pm, a pattern he continued for a few weeks after his birth via emergency c-section.

Sasha is a sweet boy, loving and kind to his little brother and often quick to apologize when he does something wrong. When I say "quickly," I'm talking a few minutes. That's quick for a 3-year-old!

He is good at counting to 13 (next comes 19), says letters, and loves to play pretend. He recently was playing that he was the Black Ninja with two stick swords stuck in the back of his shirt. "Pretend this is my pocket," he says.

Sasha happily gets up in the morning and wraps his little arms around my neck. He is concerned that I make sure to get Raiden out of his crib. When Zane pulls out of the driveway without me (such a funny trick), Sasha is the one saying not to leave Mommy.

I love you baby boy.

Mommy